At Brandwave Agency, birthdays were a big deal. It started innocently enough. Whenever someone had a birthday, the team would contribute a little money, buy a cake, decorate their desk, and sing loudly enough for everyone on the floor to know that someone had added another year to their life. Nobody complained. In fact, everyone seemed to enjoy it.
Then there was Linda. Linda loved birthdays. She was the unofficial birthday coordinator. She kept a spreadsheet with everyone’s birthdays, knew who liked chocolate cake, who preferred meat pies, and who absolutely hated being surprised.
Whenever someone’s birthday was approaching, Linda would message the team group chat.
“Guys! It’s Kojo’s birthday on Friday. Let’s make it special!” And everyone would contribute.
₵20 here, ₵30 there, sometimes more if they were celebrating a manager. Soon, birthdays became bigger. There were balloons, gift baskets, personalised mugs. Once, Linda even arranged for a photographer to take pictures of the birthday girl with the entire team. People laughed about it.
“Brandwave doesn’t play when it comes to birthdays”, someone joked, but not everyone was laughing. Ama had recently joined the company. Her birthday came in her second month. On the morning of her birthday, she walked into the office to find balloons around her desk, a cake in the conference room and a gift bag waiting for her.
Everyone sang. She smiled and thanked them. Then Linda quietly pulled her aside.
“By the way, we normally contribute ₵30 each for birthdays. Just so you know for the next one.” Ama nodded. She didn’t think much of it. Until the following month. It was Joseph’s birthday. Then another collection. Then another. By midyear, Ama realised she had contributed to almost everyone’s birthday. And every time someone celebrated, the expectation seemed to grow.
“Let’s do something bigger this time.” “Should we add a gift?” “Maybe we can order lunch too.”
Nobody officially required anyone to contribute, but saying no wasn’t easy. If you didn’t contribute, someone would ask: “Ei, you haven’t sent yours yet?” So people sent the money even when they couldn’t really afford it.
One Friday, Linda announced that the team was planning a birthday celebration for their manager. This time, the contribution was ₵100 per person. Ama stared at the message. She had just paid school fees for her younger brother and had several expenses that month. She didn’t want to contribute ₵100, but she also didn’t want to be the person who “didn’t support the team,” so she sent the money.
The celebration was beautiful. There was a large cake, food, decorations and a gift. Everyone took pictures. The manager was delighted, but on Monday morning, something unexpected happened. The manager called Linda into her office. She had seen the birthday photos, and she loved the celebration, but she had also noticed something. “Linda,” she said, “do we do this for everyone?” Linda smiled. “Yes, we try to make every birthday special.” The manager paused. “Do people actually want all of this?” Linda didn’t know what to say.
That afternoon, the manager messaged the team. She thanked everyone for the birthday celebration and then added: “Going forward, birthdays will be completely voluntary. No one should feel pressured to contribute money, organise anything or participate. A simple ‘Happy Birthday’ is more than enough.” The group chat went quiet. Then someone replied: “Thank you.” Another person added: “Honestly, I was afraid to say this.” Then another: “Same here.” Linda read the messages in surprise. She had genuinely thought everyone enjoyed the tradition but she hadn’t realised that something intended to make people feel appreciated had slowly become an obligation.
The next birthday was different. There were no balloons, no collection and no elaborate gift. The team simply gathered for five minutes, sang “Happy Birthday,” shared some cake that the celebrant had brought from home, and went back to work. Nobody complained. In fact, everyone seemed relieved. Linda eventually removed the birthday spreadsheet. She kept one thing, though. The dates. Because remembering someone’s birthday was never the problem. The pressure was.
The Lesson
Because celebrating people should never become another workplace responsibility.
Workplace celebrations should make people feel included, not obligated, because while a birthday collection may seem like a small thing, repeated expectations can create financial and social pressure, especially when employees feel they can’t comfortably say no, and sometimes the simplest gesture is a genuine “Happy Birthday,” since celebrating people should never become another workplace responsibility.
